One self-help-hippie-guru quote that I’ve always had stick with me is “If we talked to our children the way we talk to ourselves, our children would be taken away.”
This is a must read. Incredible insight from Quan over at The Quintessential Man. It’s amazing how limiting our own inner critic can be, and with the ability to shed this we can learn to embrace our own talents and ambitions wholeheartedly.
From the article:
When we were young, we learned to internalize the messages that behaviors of others around us seemed to communicate. These messages eventually cemented themselves as rules and dogmas that we mindlessly follow later on in life. They torture our sense of well-being and impede our attempts to get our adult needs met. We unconsciously become tyrants to ourselves. We cause the stress and tension that break down our bodies. We separate ourselves from reality. We become isolated from others.
The tyrant works through the inner voices in our heads. He drives us to act counter to our developing values and perception of reality.
Below are the ways of which these voices manifest themselves, acting as road blocks in different aspects of our lives. If these words came from somebody we knew, we’d stay away from that person as far as possible. Yet these voices are trying to protect us, albeit from dangers that no longer exist. They were coded into our emotional responses when we were very young. If we never fully put those perceptions to the test, those voices haunt us.
Becoming conscious of them helps us alleviate and even eliminate them. The key to disposing these tyrannies is not to fight them or layer them on top of each other. You simply recognize their origin and how they cause disvalue to your life. The more you notice them, the less power they have over you. Once deep acceptance happens and corrective actions are taken, often times in the face of anxiety, they have a natural tendency to melt away. They become awkward clothes that we were forced to wear as kids, but we quickly outgrow as adults.